Prayers Answered - Thanks Ryan

Hello all, I'm still here. I've just been underwater for the past couple of days. Through much prayer I have come to the surface today and have gotten my second breath. The past couple of days have been very difficult. Viktor all but shut down on me for the past two days. It started on Sunday. We had made a plan Saturday night to go to church in the morning and then after I would take Viktor, Vlad and Denis to the arcade down on Khreschatyk for an afternoon of driving fast and killing stuff. I didn't know that Vlad and Denis were coming with us to church until Vlad showed up at the door right before time to leave. Well off we went. Keep in mind that Viktor went to church with me the previous week and did fine. We get to church and for some reason the service is much longer than normal. Needless to say the service did not hold the three musketeer's attention very long. After the third or fourth time refereeing the slappy game between Viktor and Vlad, I was just about to separate them when Vlad and Denis decided it was time to leave. They both got up and left and Viktor looked at me like "hey I want to go to". I said just a while longer and we'll leave, although I don't think he understood me. A couple minutes later, Viktor said he had to go the bathroom and he was gone. He did not return. I was hoping that he would so I waited there just to see. On the way back to the flat, I got a call from Viktor asking where I was. I told him where I was headed and he met me there. No big deal. I believe that Viktor thought I was mad at him for leaving church although I said nothing to him about it.


Skip to later. From the time we met back up after church, I could tell that Viktor was acting as if something was wrong. I tried several times to ask what was wrong and could get nothing from him. I called Zhenia and he agreed to come by on his way to train station that afternoon just to get a pulse check and allow for some communication to take place, that did not involve charades. We do this on occasion. Allow me to back up a little bit. Over the past four or five days I could feel Viktor migrating more and more to wanting to spend time with his friends only. All he wanted to do was go out with his friends, and they were here knocking on the door before he got up each morning and would hang around until it was time to get back to the hostel before the doors closed. I felt I had been reduced to little more than a walking billfold useful only when Viktor and the Entourage were hungry or needed rodent pet supplies. This was one of the things I wanted to address with Viktor when Zhenia came by. I wasn't wanting to cut ties with the friends, I just wanted some breathing time where Viktor and I could spend a couple hours a day Mano E Mano. I wanted the Entourage to hold off coming over until after a certain time of day. That's it, he could still see his friends each day, but I wanted us to have a little time as well. Now, enter Zhenia. I could tell right away that Viktor was not happy to see Zhenia. Zhenia and I talked before we talked with Viktor. I told Zhenia that I wanted to keep the conversation very positive and upbeat. It did not go that way at all. Zhenia tried but Viktor shut down on him immediately. For some reason he thought I was mad at him and that Zhenia was just there to relay my madness in Russian. That was it, Viktor spiraled in from there, head down, refusing to acknowledge any communications. After a while, Zhenia told him that he could leave because it was no use going forward. The one thing that Zhenia was able to understand before the communications collapse was that Viktor wanted the same freedom as his buddies in the trade school entourage. We talked a little about life in a family not always being about what we want individually but sometimes what is best for the family. He told Zhenia that he wasn't the type who liked this part of family life and that he would do what he wanted to do when he wanted. Zhenia confided in me that when he was in trade school he loved the freedom as well. All of that freedom is very attractive to a 16 year old who lives only in the moment. These kids who graduate the orphanages and go to trade schools are free to roam at will with the only exception being that they have to be back in the hostel before they close the doors at 10:00 pm. His friends come and go as they please with no one telling them what to do at all. Each trade school is structured differently from what I can tell. The school that Vlad, Denis and Valla attend give them 38 grv each day to live on. That is about $8 US per day. That covers food and anything else they may want or need. I don't know if they get a clothing allowance or not. Let me just say that I have gathered my information from talking with the kids themselves and since my Russian can only insure that I can find McDonald's and the nearest toilet, I can't say that my facts are 100% accurate. It's not gourmet, but they can eat three meals a day on that sum. Most of the kids I talk to only eat twice a day. A loaf of fresh bread at the market is a little over 3 grv. Other trade schools are set up to feed the students a breakfast and lunch and then provide a central kitchen in the hostel and ingredients so that they can prepare their own dinner.

Zhenia speculated that Viktor was seeing all of his friends roaming around free and that it looked good to him. Also, there is a young lady involved. Her name is Valla and she graduated with Viktor from O-21. I remember all to well some of the foolish things I did at 16 because of a girl. Remember, no girl is worth waiting 12 hours for by the Sun Sphere at the Worlds Fair, and the ones that are won't make you wait.

We were concerned that Viktor may go to court on Friday and tell the judge that he wants to stay here and go to trade school. If he does, it's over. If he puts his head down and refuses to acknowledge the judge, with this particular judge, it's probably over. I could not believe this turn around and how quickly it happened. I called Sharon completely baffled, not knowing what to do. Luckily she did. She put out the call for prayer warriors to pound on the doors of heaven on our behalf and they responded. One of the first responses we receive was from our friends in B'ham, AL who apoted Viktor's best friend Ryan at the end of last year. Ryan's mom said that he wanted to call Viktor. She said that she would let Ryan know what was going on with Viktor so that he, who had gone thru much of the same himself, could talk to him about it. Ryan and Viktor talked this morning. After the call, Viktor was a different young man. I was no longer on ignore. Ryan confirmed something we had suspected. It seems that his friends have been trying to convince him not to go thru with the adoption. I don't know whether its jealousy about not being one of the chosen ones or if it's just not wanting to lose a friend that would make someone try to talk someone else into giving up such an opportunity. Ryan assured me that Viktor loved us and that he was definitely going to go thru with the adoption and come to America. God gave Ryan the right words at the right time to calm Viktor's fears as well as ours. Thank you to all the prayer warriors who have petitioned and continue to petition our Heavenly Father on our behalf.

I am so thankful for the change in the situation here that I'm a little embarrassed to ask for even more prayer. Our good day ended on a bit of a sour note when my back went out this evening while cooking dinner. I have trouble with my Sciatic nerve on occasion and my last attack was about two years ago. Looks like it was time for another. I'm OK as long as I don't try to get up from the fetal position.

Viktor's best friend Ryan at home in B'ham AL. I took this picture just before we left for Ukraine in July. I can't wait to see Viktor and Ryan together in the states.

The ever elusive Valla. Please pray for Valla. I think she really likes Viktor and I'm sure she will be very hurt by his leaving. Viktor also told me tonight that she had to go to the hospital today. I couldn't understand the reason, the charade included putting his hand on his chest and coughing.

Viktor playing in a soccer match at O-21 this past Saturday, his Birthday. The opposing team is from a local High School. The match ended in a 1-1 tie.

The franchise players of the O-21 Futbol team and their coach. Sergey, Viktor, Andre and Martin (pronounced Mar-teen).